the other side

Lawrence couldn’t decide if it would be easier to beg for his job back to Hector compared to Kit. He could look to find some common ground with Hector as they were both vampires. Surely he understood just how horrible a vampire could be without their emotions. Although it wasn’t clear if Hector had ever taken that plunge. But maybe it would have been easier to show Hector he was sorry. That wasn’t going to happen though because Hector wasn’t even there so Lawrence had no option but to approach Kit. He owed Kit an apology anyway.

Something that was keeping him going was knowing that one day he’d forgive himself, just like Magnus said he needed to. That day wasn’t anytime soon. There was still a mountain of remorse and guilt he needed to work through before he made it out the other side. There was a light deep inside the tunnel that he could just about see. Luckily Phoebe was by his side, dragging his ass toward the light everyday even on the days he was resisting. Some days he just wanted to lie in bed, avoiding everyone.

The only thing that was dragging him back towards the darkness was thinking about Penny. Thoughts of her had him running away from the light. On top of dealing with the weight of his emotions he was having to mend a broken heart too. Stitching himself back up again, closing himself off to any future relationships for the foreseeable. For years he’d avoided getting attached to anyone then the first person he does get attached to ends up letting him down. Fucking typical. Every time he saw Tobi in the club he wanted to smash his face in. Beat him until he was no longer recognisable.

The club wasn’t due to open for another twenty minutes. Lawrence yanked the door open and stepped inside. He gave the other members of staff a small smile as he headed toward the door leading to Hector’s office. If Kit wasn’t there then he must be somewhere in the club. For some reason Lawrence still hadn’t been removed from viewing the online rota. He could see they hadn’t found anyone to replace him, which could work his favour. Maybe they needed him back. Very unlikely though.

Lawrence lingered outside Hector’s office for a few seconds, his ear hovering near the door listening carefully. There was someone inside. Lightly he tapped on the door, waiting to be called inside. He pushed the door open, his eyes meeting Kit’s, “Don’t yell at me to get out, please… I haven’t come to start a fight.” He closed the door behind him, leaning against the frame, “I’ve come to apologise for what I did… I… I wasn’t in the right frame of mind. My emotions are back now though and I feel terrible for what I did to you and for killing Santana.” He let out a heavy sigh, trying not to start fall to pieces in front of Kit, “I know we don’t always see eye to eye and shit, but I still consider you a friend.” Perhaps not in the most conventional sense, but in a way where Lawrence would protect Kit if necessary.

Anxiety bubbled in his chest, as he tried to figure out how to word his next sentence. “I know you’re gonna say no… but I have to ask. Is there any chance I could have my job back? And I can promise you nothing like this will happen again ‘cause fuck… I’m in a world of pain right now with my emotions.” This was the part where Hector could potentially understand how Lawrence was feeling. He could have gone into details with Kit, trying to explain how he was feeling but he wasn’t here to try and squeeze sympathy out of Kit. It probably wouldn’t have worked anyway.


KIT CLARKE