CHASE BUCKLEY
Demon
Posts: 139
Age:
38
Occupation:
Detective
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Roxanne Braschi
Played by:
ANGE
Last seen Apr 27, 2024 18:43:01 GMT
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Post by CHASE BUCKLEY on Feb 23, 2023 22:58:12 GMT
Standing in the hallway, he’d stared down at the cardboard box on the mat. The delivery guy hadn’t bothered to shift the bag of food aside, he’d just stuffed the box behind it, like that would hide it from anybody who walked past. Feeling that pit in his stomach twitch like it was gonna try and open itself up black hole wide again, Chase bent and picked both up. Maybe if Mikey had been here they both would’ve been sitting on the counter when he’d walked in, Roxxi’s presence back in the apartment without him having to pick it up, feeling it like it weighed a thousand fucking pounds.
The first couple of days the food had been tossed in the trash, his stomach twisting hard enough that he wouldn’t have been able to keep it down, even if he’d tried. They’d kept coming though, here, at the station, Tupperware tubs of a love he’d been so damn sure of before she’d twisted the knife again – before they had.
Chase shifted on the couch, thumping his shoulders into the arm like it’d somehow make it more comfortable. The place was too quiet, the white noise of an apartment that had stayed empty for too long ramping up until it was a constant whine in his ears. She’d have been curled up down the side of him, snatching the graphic novel out of his hands before he’d even got halfway through it. ’Batman? Some orphan brat thinks he can take on every super villain in the city? No way.’ Even that much about Bruce woulda taken an explanation, speech bubbles read out while Roxxi had cackled and rolled her eyes.
He flipped the page, tried to get into the next scene, but after a second of staring at the page, Chase set it aside on the coffee table. Right there between the stack of washed Tupperware tubs and that damn box. The tape still on, the label defiantly clear. Christmas was rolling closer and he’d made an early start on it, not wanting to rush round town at the last minute, picking up something from the gas station on Christmas Eve cause the clock had run down. Now it was the elephant in the room, constantly in the corner of his eye, mocking him, daring him to finally pick apart that knot they’d put in his gut and accept that he had no damn right to be half as angry as he’d been.
Sitting up, Chase propped his elbows on his knees, staring up at the clock on the kitchen wall. Just enough of it peeked out around the corner of the doorway that he could tell the window of opportunity was opening up. He drew in a sharp breath through his nose, let it out as he glanced at the door. Was she creeping down the hallway now, eyes on the door, hoping that she could go again before he opened the door? Maybe, but Roxxi hadn’t been the one who decided to leave that morning. His voice had been the one that cracked through the apartment, telling them both to get out of his sight.
Eyes underscored by shadows almost as dark as his eyes squeezed shut, the pain in his chest rolling back in. He hadn’t been able to look at them without seeing Roxxi’s hands on Mikey, the same ones that had slid over his skin, brushing the knots of healed bone, the scars, like she could erase them all. He’d tried to remind himself that she hadn’t known who Mikey was when she’d … when they’d … but it hadn’t wiped the images out of his head.
They tried to swim in now, but instead that film reel stuck on the two of them the night of the ball. Right here. On the rug, talking about a future he’d wanted with every fucking bit of his heart. Kids, a life built with them seeing their parents so damn in love it’d make ‘em sick every day. That wasn’t a future you’d put together if you intended on slipping right back into some other guy’s bed. Roxxi had been in his as that past had clawed its way back thanks to a dumb kid, holding onto him, believing that future was in tatters. Nah, like every bump, ever cut that’d ever been incised in his head, this was a wound that’d heal with her touch and a repeated promise that it wasn’t gonna happen again.
The quiet clip of footsteps down the hallway had his eyes flying open. Chase got up, crept across the rug on sock-clad feet. At the door he hovered, one hand spread on it, like he could hold her right there with it. He squinted at the peep hole, seeing the fall of dark hair, the face that’d stopped just about every heart in Kitschy Kitschy Coo that first night, including his. Did he do it? Grow a pair, rip the band aid off, whatever fucking analogy you were meant to us for a little bravery these days?
He almost expected her to bolt as he opened the door, was ready to make a grab for her. She could still stop his heart in his chest, even if it was just pieces of it twitching there these days, the chum it’d be turned into not all the way reformed. ”Hey,” he rasped hoarsely. When the words ‘I didn’t mean it’ didn’t come, Chase nervously wet his lips and reached out, his fingers curling around the wrist of the hand holding that bag. ”Give me a second? Don’t go. I … we … need to talk. You wanna bring that in?” You wanna risk an argument right here? The fact that the bags had kept arriving when she coulda just left him to starve to death in his misery here said she did, but what the fuck did he know.
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ROXANNE BRASCHI
Chimera
psychic-skinwalker
Posts: 176
Age:
30
Occupation:
Professor at Whitmore College
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Chase Buckley
Played by:
Julia
Last seen May 17, 2024 19:45:21 GMT
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Post by ROXANNE BRASCHI on Feb 27, 2023 0:13:53 GMT
━ i don't know where i'm going, but i sure know where i've been ━ SHE DIDN’T NEED HIM. IT WAS BETTER THIS WAY. THEY would never have worked, anyway. Soon enough, all her lies would float to the surface, and Chase wouldn’t have wanted her anymore. It was better for him to leave her because she’d slept with his brother before they ever got together rather than know the truth about her family.
He’d hurt, but he would hurt less this way. And that was all Roxxi wanted, really—to take care of Chase.
But didn’t he love her? She kept leaving containers full of food for him at the station’s front desk like little white flags. He knew who they were from. She didn’t have to attach a desperate note saying, “I love you. I miss you. I’m sorry I fucked Mikey before we started dating, but can you get over it already?”
No, she knew the lies of omission were the worst part. And the fact that it was his brother, not just some stranger on a video everyone and their mother had seen. Perhaps it was a combination of things; perhaps she was never meant for this.
Even that felt like bullshit, though. They were made for each other. Roxxi felt it in her bones, but she’d let him go if that’s what he wanted. He was just dumb for never calling her back.
She’d cried at first. Consulted Jo, felt awful, empty, fucking stupid. But as the days dragged on, Roxxi became bitter, almost irritated that he hadn’t called. She’d accept their end if that’s what he wanted, but what the fuck? Was he not man enough to tell her it was over? ‘Sorry, Roxxi, you’re too much of a wh-re. This doesn’t work for me anymore.’ P*ssy. A few more days and she’d snap. She’d show up at his office and let him know just how she felt.
Maybe she was past the point of being okay with losing him and was better off not pretending anymore.
If she could apologize for who she used to be, she would, but Roxxi didn’t think that was fair. He hadn’t told her anything about his past, and whether or not she already knew didn’t matter—he hadn’t trusted her with that. If Chase was a different person, if he vehemently claimed that Mikey was, then why couldn’t she be, too?
If Mikey deserved to keep his past a secret, then why did she have to bare everything to Chase? Why did it matter? She’d never look at another man while they were together. He should know that. Should’ve known.
This was her last food delivery. Next time she might throw it in his fucking face━and if it wasn’t at his work, she’d pound on the door and shout at him to grow a pair and open it, then she’d throw it in his face. Maybe dent his nose a little more. Bafangu chooch. Fuck him. Fuck him for making her fall in love with him when she only wanted to keep him safe. Fuck him for promising a family, giving her that dream, and then tearing it away when he heard something he didn’t like━get the fuck out of my apartment, Roxxi; get the fuck out of my life while you’re at it. And fuck his brother (oh, wait, she’d already done that) for cornering her. Chase could have gone his whole life without knowing, and nothing would have changed.
She’d slaved over this fucking meal, too. Osso Buco, veal shanks and vegetables with orzo on the side. She’d even bought an excellent red wine for Chase to gulp down without the slightest idea of how well they paired, how he was supposed to mix the flavours and savour them. Ah, well, at least she wouldn’t be there to cringe while he did it. Roxxi added a small container of cacio e pepe to go with it━a desperate attempt to remind him of the day he fixed her sink. It was the most romantic meal she could think of… if this didn’t work, then nothing would.
Actually, maybe bludgeoning him with the next one would do the trick.
She didn’t know if he was even eating them. If he wasn’t, then she’d kill him again after the first time.
She changed her life for this man; she’d somehow slipped into her first serious relationship without wanting it, and now he wouldn’t speak to her. Roxxi could kill him just thinking about it.
The elevator door announced her arrival at his floor and, just like every other time, the buzz in her stomach grew. Perhaps she’d catch him at the right time━see him just as he entered or just as he was leaving. Maybe he’d talk to her because he was forced to.
All she wanted was to spend the holidays together. Roxxi wanted a family Christmas━her first since she’d turned nine━and she thought she’d finally get it with Chase. Perhaps even meet his parents.
Maybe that’s what he was avoiding. Sure, she didn’t seem like the kind of girl you took to meet your parents, but she could behave when she had to━how did he think she’d kept her job for so long? Oh, right, by the skin of her fucking teeth━and didn’t he love her? He said so. It shouldn’t have mattered if he loved her.
Roxxi peered down the hallway before she began walking. No sign of him. She didn’t even know if he was home. Usually, she tried to time it so he wouldn’t be, but sometimes her schedule wasn’t always on her side. It wasn’t as if she’d know; there was no driveway to spot his car in.
She sighed softly and shuffled the bag of containers in her hand, trying to decide whether she would place the wine in it or leave it outside. Roxxi listened for signs of life on the other side of the door, but she didn’t hear him shifting or moving. There was a heartbeat, though, thumping along with hers. He was there, on the other side of the door. She considered kicking it down.
But then it was opening by itself. He was opening it. Chase was on the other side of the door, and Roxxi didn’t know whether to kiss or punch him. Instead, she stood there frozen━like an idiot━holding the bag of food in one hand and the bottle in the other. “I don’t know.” Roxxi answered honestly, though what she meant was, I might want to break this bottle on your skull instead. She stepped in anyway, led like a dog by the wrist. Which was ironic, because the only way she could get close to him lately was as a dog. She hadn’t been able to see him at first, but eventually managed to pop in once or twice to make sure he was okay.
“Apparently we don’t need to talk. At all. For almost two weeks.” Roxxi’s voice was clipped as she stepped away from him to set the wine and plastic bag on the kitchen table. She could feel angry, sad, uncomfortable, but that wouldn’t stop her from traipsing around his apartment like she owned the place. “You want to talk now? Or will you tell me to leave again as soon as you get upset?” Roxxi’s eyes stayed level with his own, unwavering, even as they filled with tears. She knew it was her fault. She could be angry all she wanted, but it didn’t change the fact that she’d kept something from Chase. She loved him more than she could’ve ever imagined loving anyone, and, ultimately, though she did want to save him from the heartache, it was better for her if he didn’t know.
CHASE BUCKLEY |
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CHASE BUCKLEY
Demon
Posts: 139
Age:
38
Occupation:
Detective
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Roxanne Braschi
Played by:
ANGE
Last seen Apr 27, 2024 18:43:01 GMT
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Post by CHASE BUCKLEY on Mar 5, 2023 18:01:55 GMT
Oh yeah, seeing her again hurt. Like another knife to the gut, or maybe the twisting of the one that’d lodged there under his sternum when they’d dropped that ‘we’ve got something we need to tell you’ on him. He hadn’t been dumb enough to think it was gonna be magically all better when he laid eyes on Roxxi again, but was sharper than he’d expected. Chase wrapped one hand around the edge of the door, using the bite of it to chase that pain back. It ought to have been possible considering how much of the pain he’d rationalised away in those two weeks.
Smarten up. See that neither one of them had knowingly wrapped their hands around the hilt of that knife. He wasn’t about to call it an accident, not even in his head. You didn’t sleep with a guy ‘accidentally’, but you could do it without knowing the full truth of a matter and that was what he wanted to believe of both of them.
Chase held onto his beliefs mentally, as he reached out to grip Roxxi’s wrist. An anchor to keep her there when he’d been the one to cut her and Mikey free in the first place. He swallowed hard, feeling the warmth of her steal into fingertips that’d been cold since that morning. Numb from the loss of all he’d been holding onto so tight, a possible future that’d seemed lost the moment his heart had shattered. Prematurely.
All the rationalisation he’d done had shown where those cracks should’ve been and that wasn’t clean through his heart. It shouldn’t have been different to hearing about the video. The betrayals – if they were there – were in the past, before they’d gotten together, before they’d been a them instead of just some brute of a guy who’d had a pretty woman look twice at him.
His fingers slid down from her skin at Roxxi’s answer to that plea he should’ve been dragging out of himself days before. Chase felt her pulse there, just a flutter at her wrist that he could hold on to. Even if she turned away, inexplicably telling him to shove his apology, he’d have that much of her left there, imprinted on his fingertips. ”That’s … fair, I guess …” Although it wasn’t. She was the one who kept coming here, leaving him that little plastic tubs full of love, like she wanted him to keep feeling it long enough to be able to get his head and heart around all of this.
Roxxi stepped in, not pulling away yet. He closed the door behind her, finally let his fingers drift away from her as she stepped away from him to set the plastic bag and the wine down on the table. Pressing his lips together, he dropped his head, remembering how they’d sat there on her birthday, the purloined meal and wine there, Roxxi’s smile so smug as she’d figured out what he’d done. He’d made it up to her after, everything else that had happened that night on him, not on Carnegie.
Shaking his head, Chase followed her. He rubbed his hand against his chest, feeling the ache still there, sharp as ever under his ribs. Had he been out of order taking that much time to himself to try and get over the fact that her and Mikey had … No. He wasn’t about to feel guilty for that. ”We didn’t need to with words,” he argued, his gaze cutting back to the living room where the tubs were stacked – that had been her love language to him. Maybe it’d been one way, but he hadn’t just cut the two of them out of his mind, he’d been tied up in a million knots, trying to find some way to untie them.
Chase sighed, meeting Roxxi’s own. Naw, he wasn’t gonna chickenshit out of this again. Maybe they’d end up screaming at one another, but that was better than the silence he’d barely been tolerating. ”I’m ready to, yeah. You gonna tell me I didn’t have the right to then?” The cut had been fresh then, his heart haemorrhaging over what he thought the two people he loved most in the world had been doing behind his back. ”I’m sorry it was so long. I … needed room to think about it. To realise … yeah … I coulda dealt with it better. I’m sorry – not for being hurt, but the way I dealt with it.” The apology should’ve left his throat feeling bloody, but it didn’t. What coppery tang there was, he swallowed back.
Her tears were burning him, stinging like salt had been ground into his heart as he took a step towards her. Chase tried to swallow it all back, but most of this was still sticking in his throat. ”It really was all over before we … before we were us?” He shouldn’t have needed the reassurance, but he did. A band aid that would seal over what remained of the wound that’d been carved into him, leaving it to finally heal fully.
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ROXANNE BRASCHI
Chimera
psychic-skinwalker
Posts: 176
Age:
30
Occupation:
Professor at Whitmore College
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Chase Buckley
Played by:
Julia
Last seen May 17, 2024 19:45:21 GMT
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Post by ROXANNE BRASCHI on Apr 10, 2023 22:01:39 GMT
━ i don't know where i'm going, but i sure know where i've been ━ WHAT HE MEANT WAS SHE DIDN’T NEED TO. ROXXI KEPT delivering her little messages of love, loud and clear, reminders that she was still there, that she wanted him even if he hated her. It’d almost been too long━two weeks would have been torture. No, it already was torture. Dio, she wanted to die every minute she wasn’t with him━every minute she sat at home knowing he was somewhere thinking about what she’d done before him.
He was ready now? Now. Why now? Why not any of the other dozens of times? And why was it only just before she’d almost reached her breaking point? Was this some sort of divine intervention, telling Roxxi not to let go of him? Keeping her hanging on before she cut ties?
At this point, could she really?
Of course he had a right to be upset before. Chase knew it, and Roxxi did, too━somewhere buried deep down beneath all her denial and irritation over it. She puffed out a breath and rolled her eyes sideways, looking away from him. Maybe he didn’t have to kick them out, but what was he going to do with the two of them standing in his home, telling him they’d kept a secret?
“It’s fine.” Roxxi whispered, though she wanted to scream and shout at him━hang Chase for his mistreatment of her just to distract from her own wrongdoings. Love truly did change a person, it seemed. She wouldn’t tell him not to apologize, though━she wasn’t that different yet. “You… I understand. I would have done the same thing.” Or worse. Likely worse. He wouldn’t have been able to leave because she would’ve buried him somewhere nearby. It didn’t feel like the right time to joke about it, though.
She wanted to step away like he’d done to her. Roxxi wanted to jump back and put her hands up to ward him off just so Chase could feel the same burn that’d replayed in her mind over and over, but she wasn’t that cruel.
And she wasn’t that strong, either. She’d missed him too much.
Reaching out, Roxxi hesitated━suddenly worried he’d back away again━before carefully wrapping her fingers around his forearm. It wasn’t enough and too much all at once. She exhaled slowly, finding comfort in finally being able to touch him. Roxxi verified there was nothing for her to heal━nothing physical, anyway━and kept their touch at just that.
Roxxi released another breath at his question, her deep brown eyes welling again, staring at his even darker ones. For such a big, scary man, he looked so soft and doe-eyed, so hurt, and Roxxi hated that she’d done that to him. Because no matter how much she liked to turn around and blame Chase or Mikey, it really was her fault. She’d known all along.
Though, she didn’t have any idea how deeply she’d fall for Chase Buckley, or at all.
“Of course, Chase.” She blubbered up a quiet sob when she spoke without meaning to, and gently squeezed his arms, not letting her eyes stray from his. “There was no one… no one since you. You’re everything to me, amore mio.” Roxxi sniffled, shifting just a little closer. “I know you said you didn’t want to hear it, but they really didn’t mean anything, Chase. Every man before you… I had one short relationship in high school, and after that, there was nothing until you came along. I’ve never felt so much love for another person. I never want you to think that I… have ever looked at anybody else from the moment I knew I had you, because I haven’t. It’s you, Chase. You are everything for me.” It didn’t matter that she knew who Mikey was before, because she wasn’t lying whatsoever. It changed with him, and she hoped he still wanted everything with her.
She wanted to step in again, rest her forehead on his and talk about the babies they planned to have. She wanted to tell him in every way possible how much she loved him━with words and without━but Roxxi had to wait. She wasn’t sure if Chase would accept her apology or if he needed more time and, even if he did, that didn’t mean they were back to where they’d been. She had to deal with the consequences now━the thing she’d avoided for so long━and that was her responsibility. And she’d do it because she loved him.
CHASE BUCKLEY |
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CHASE BUCKLEY
Demon
Posts: 139
Age:
38
Occupation:
Detective
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Roxanne Braschi
Played by:
ANGE
Last seen Apr 27, 2024 18:43:01 GMT
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Post by CHASE BUCKLEY on Apr 15, 2023 20:21:47 GMT
It hadn’t been fine, not since the night Roxxi had vanished from the apartment, leaving Mikey behind to cover for her. Something had been torn open in him that night, but after she come back, full of apologies, he’d thought that he’d been able to patch it up. Things had been so good after, they’d talked right here about having kids, every painful truth that had spilled out before that night erased by the idea of a future that’d all seemed to be built on a lie when he really looked at it. They shouldn’t have been though, and trying to see what he’d missed in it all had torn him apart.
He’d paced from one side of the apartment to the other, hands clamped around his head, trying to find signs of what had been hidden in every memory he had of them. Chase could’ve turned now and sketched out the route of his pain for her, but that wasn’t fair. None of it had been, on any of them. The broken pieces of his heart had glittered in that sudden space between all three of them, like shards of broken glass, ready to slice into all of them if they rushed forward into it before he’d had the chance to clear it all up.
Chase could feel them grating inside of his chest, the last remaining slivers that he hadn’t been able to patch together snagging at his heart, his conscience at Roxxi’s words. One corner of his mouth twitched, but the smile wouldn’t hold. ”No, you wouldn’t,” he said, absolutely certain at that. ”You woulda added to this.” He gestured up at his face, the one she’d called him out on the minute she’d picked him out of the crowd at the quiz night. There was no way he woulda defended himself either, the woman maybe, when Roxxi went at her with fists and nails and knocked her on her ass. Only then would she have crumbled, finishing the damage to him as she did it. He’d seen the way Roxxi’s heart broke, had held it together and tried to heal the cracks. This time, when she’d held it out to him with the hope that he could look past what had happened before she’d given it to him that first time around, he’d shoved it back in her face and shoved both of them out the door.
He wouldn’t have melted into her touch the way he did now if Roxxi had reached for him that morning. Unable to see anything but his girlfriend and his brother together, he’d have torn himself away, spilling worse than he had out that wound cut deep into his heart. Chase’s head hung low, the space between them gone. All he could see when he looked down was her fingers on his skin again. He extended his fingers, most finding nothing but air, one grazing against her arm, as though he could erase the wounds he’d carved back with it. The sound of Roxxi’s exhalation had him looking up at her, dark eyes meeting, hers glassy enough to tighten his throat. Would a truth he didn’t want to hear again now make his well up the same? No. Chase let out a long breath as Roxxi blubbed out the words that he’d thought would be the truth he couldn’t stomach then. She didn’t stop there, the reassurances poured on, washing over him a wave that almost took his legs out from under him. Roxxi stepped closer, her fingers squeezing his arm like she was pressing her words into him. ”I couldn’t hear it then. I wouldn’t have got any of that.” The heartache would’ve left him deaf to any sort of truth.
Fuck.
She wasn’t stopping. The truth was a battering ram that disintegrated any lingering doubts and hurt. He shoulda done this from a distance, stayed pressed against the door to get his apologies out, but that distance had vanished and now the guilt that he’d taken so long to listen welled up hot enough to scald. ”All I could see was his hands on you. You know, all that time spent locked up and he had to come out and find my girl.” It’d taken days for those images to fade from behind his eyes. Now Chase looked, his hand coming up to cup her elbow, to draw her in.
He lifted his other hand, brushing her hair back, his thumb tracing from the corner of her mouth to beneath one of those tear filled eyes. ”You’re it. You’re all there’s ever been for me and I saw me losing all of that – it wouldn’t have mattered if it was with Mikey or the guy in the video, or anybody else there might ever have been. I was getting a life with you, we were gonna have kids and I thought I was losing it all.” And it had broken him. He had plenty of nightmares to bring to this relationship, ones that Roxxi hadn’t heard about yet, but not another woman.
”I love you and even when I was hurting, I didn’t forget that.” Chase swallowed, not feeling any of that broken glass stabbing agony in his throat or chest anymore. ”Did he tell you anything about what happened before? I know you saw what happened to him – but to me?” Those stories likely woulda been there too, how close he’d come to not being here at all spelled out in black and white. They still haunted his dreams, the same way Roxxi had over the last few days – bitter laughter, streaks of red filling his vision as they’d punched and stomped, the cool black that’d swallowed him for weeks after.
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ROXANNE BRASCHI
Chimera
psychic-skinwalker
Posts: 176
Age:
30
Occupation:
Professor at Whitmore College
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Chase Buckley
Played by:
Julia
Last seen May 17, 2024 19:45:21 GMT
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Post by ROXANNE BRASCHI on May 15, 2023 20:02:21 GMT
━ i don't know where i'm going, but i sure know where i've been ━ ROXXI WASN’T A MAN, SO MAYBE SHE COULDN’T UNDERSTAND THE EXACT way Chase felt, but she definitely thought she could relate. Even the idea of some other woman’s hands on him had her blood boiling, and that was thinking about them fully clothed. Chase had the image in his mind (and on his computer screen) of someone else’s (his brother’s) hands on her naked body. She would’ve killed her sister and then Chase shortly after. If anything, he was showing mercy by forgiving her in less than two weeks, but that didn’t stop Roxxi from feeling like she deserved it a little sooner. Or maybe… something other than complete silence.
My girl. She didn’t know why that made her stomach twist into knots and her lips pull into a smile, but it did. It made her feel so good despite what he was really saying. She loved him more than anything, and he wouldn’t lose her. Not now, not ever━Roxxi had made her decision, though it was selfish and could potentially put him in danger. Whatever happened, they’d deal with it. She would keep protecting him, and everything would be okay. This━their love━would never change.
Roxxi sniffled quietly as she stared up at him, her skin on fire in all the places they were touching. She wanted more of him, and Chase gave her what she was too nervous to take, his hand cradling her face like she was just a baby. Soft, totally the opposite of the woman who lied about her lineage and turned into a giant, dangerous animal once a month. “You’ll never lose that.” Roxxi practically whimpered, catching her teeth on her lip to stop it from quivering. It didn’t work. “You’ll never lose us, Chase. I’ve never wanted that with anyone but you.” She still did. She wanted Chase’s babies, as many of them as they could stand, and she’d protect them even though they’d be walking targets for Emiliano. It didn’t matter; nothing mattered except their love for one another, and Emiliano wouldn’t keep that from them. Not like he did for Giorgia.
Finally giving in, because she knew it was safe now, Roxxi tilted forward and pressed her forehead to Chase’s, just resting into him for a moment. The breaths she dragged in were shallow and shaky, but they were filled with his scent, with the realization that she hadn’t lost him, either. They were together again. Maybe things would be sore for the next little while, but they’d recover, and hopefully she wouldn’t fuck it up again.
She pulled back a few inches as he continued, dark eyes searching his face. What would she tell him? It’d have to be another lie━though she wanted nothing but to stop doing that━because he couldn’t know that she was aware of all the intimate details; perhaps more than even Chase himself knew. She remembered the men returning, how they would laugh as they washed blood from their hands and boasted about the way they’d tormented him. Roxxi could still feel her arms trembling and her stomach turning; how sick their laughter made her. She hated them, and even before meeting Chase, she felt so sorry for him.
It was around the same time she’d brought Luke home━the first boyfriend she’d just mentioned━and recalled the way they’d twisted him into someone almost completely unrecognizable. She hoped it was just a coincidence. They would never change Chase.
“We never really spoke, Chase,” Roxxi said softly, “We weren’t friends.” She didn’t want to go into detail about her relationship (or lack thereof) with his brother, but he had to know that it wasn’t anything more than a quick, meaningless hookup. Sure, he only knew about the one time, but that’s all it ever was. She didn’t wine and dine anybody else like she did with Chase, but that wasn’t a joke she was about to make.
In any case, he was going to share everything she wasn’t supposed to know, everything she’d been waiting for him to trust her with, and she wasn’t about to ruin that.
“But… yes. Only bits and pieces, but I…” Roxxi sighed, “I don’t want to say I know anything, because I only read words on a screen. I want to hear it from you, I want you to tell me what happened.” He deserved that, and━if she hadn’t fucked up by mentioning Mikey’s stint in prison━he would’ve gotten it. “If you want, amore mio.” Roxxi clarified with a small smile, lifting her hands to take one of his in both and bringing it to her lips. “Are you hungry? I could heat up…” She was stressed again. Roxxi’s eyes flicked to the bag she’d delivered, though she couldn’t imagine Chase was thinking of his stomach at a time like this. Whatever, it was on the table (literally and figuratively) for them to sit and eat while they talked. Either way, she’d keep one hand on him the whole time, and she’d try not to fall apart when she heard all the ways her family had tried to destroy him.
CHASE BUCKLEY |
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CHASE BUCKLEY
Demon
Posts: 139
Age:
38
Occupation:
Detective
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Roxanne Braschi
Played by:
ANGE
Last seen Apr 27, 2024 18:43:01 GMT
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Post by CHASE BUCKLEY on May 25, 2023 20:11:07 GMT
Care – love - had been evident in each of the bags that’d been dropped off. Roxxi hadn’t hammered on the door, demanding that he tear his feelings out of the bloody pieces of a heart that’d been carved up by the imagined infidelity and offer them up to her so that she could start to fix them. She’d remained there, hovering on the edges of his life in a way that Mikey hadn’t. That stung, but he’d been the one to do it, shoving the brother that he’d sworn to stick by no matter what away. Like the bites he’d eventually swallowed, that love had slowly filled him up again. The tide line of it had been in his throat when he’d heard her coming, ready to spill back out in small morsels that he hoped would show the same to her. And to Mikey in time.
The sting didn’t hit the same way when he thought about his brother now. Chase’s brows were still furrowed, although the lines that seemed permanently etched between them in the last couple of weeks softened as his explanation pulled a smile out of Roxxi. It was his hand on her now, his he imagined retracing each inch, each curve, like he could remove the touch of anybody else who’d ever been close to her with his own. He wasn’t blind to Roxxi’s beauty, hadn’t been even on that first night when she’d bullshitted her way through the quiz at the comic book store. Guys were never gonna keep their eyes or their hands to themselves, but that was a future he wanted to put up with, even if it mean a lifetime of teaching assholes the meaning of monogamy. At the end of the night she’d be patching his knuckles, hopefully without those tears in her eyes.
Shit.
An apology wedged in his throat like a fish bone, sharp and just as painful, as she sniffled, those tear mirrored eyes staring up at him. The morning it had all fallen apart he’d seen that future crumbling through his fingers like the ashes of a future gone up in flames. ”I thought I would,” he muttered soft, his frown deepening as his thumb ran slowly along the line of her cheekbone. Past tense. He wasn’t delusional enough to think that healing this rift now was gonna mean that nothing would ever come along to tear them up again, but he was sure of her now at least. ”I never did either. You pulled me right up on the stage that night and that was it. I started wantin’ everythin’ I didn’t think I’d ever get.” Because sacrifice had been a part of his life from the moment Georgie Agnelli had convinced Mikey to go sneaking out of the house that first time.
A long exhalation slipped out of him as Roxxi eased in, resting her forehead against his. His eyes slipping shut while they stayed there, sharing the same air, breathing in the fug of emotion, letting it bleed away as they exhaled again. The hand that had cradled her cheek slipped to the back of her neck like she might pull away, not budging when she actually did – just inches this time, not rushing from the apartment as his heartache exploded out on that bitter wave (the one he hadn’t realised had purged almost everything in one go). He wanted it all gone, the wound drained so it would all heal cleanly, no added scars carved into his heart.
He knew that spelling out every little detail of his life before wouldn’t do much for that, but he wasn’t the only one who’d been torn up by this. The frown was back, over his own strides straight back into the battle ground the centre of their relationship had become. ”I thought … maybe …” There’d been some exchange at least, something that made what had happened between Mikey and Roxxi something more than just that one physical act, even if it was all spoken with the bitterness he’d practically been able to taste between the two of them. The scalpel sharp blade of the truth tasted almost metallic in his mouth, but it was nothing like it had been the night they’d come for him. Maybe it was the memory of it welling up like the blood from his wounds now, choking on it as he curled on the front stoop of his house, boots slamming down onto his ribs, something sharp and heavy cracking into his head. His gaze ticked up to meet hers as Roxxi admitted there were bits of it she knew. Chase pressed his lips together, nodding. ”I want,” he whispered hoarsely.
There was a rustiness to the laugh that creaked out of him. The last time he’d laughed had been right here, before. Sniffing in a breath, he drew back, one hand dropping to her elbow like he didn’t want to let go yet. ”I’ll tell you while you do that.” Not here. If he drew her down onto the couch, maybe it wouldn’t come out, he’d just sink into the comfort of having her back, muting himself to avoid putting the pain back into her eyes.
Leading the way to the kitchen, he sank down heavily onto one of the chairs at the kitchen table. His gaze followed every move she made, ticking twitchily from her hands, to the microwave, to her face and away again. ”I know you saw what Mikey did. The bullshit they printed in the newspaper. After all of that I couldn’t stop thinkin’, the only thing that mattered was gettin’ myself somewhere where I could pay them back, the guys that made him do all that. That’s when I decided to become a cop.” One corner of his mouth lifted for just a second before it dropped back.
”A badge didn’t stop ‘em. There’d been shit goin’ down between some of the gangs for a while – the Agnellis never seemed to want it to stop – I tried to keep cleanin’ it up, but one night they tracked me down, decided to show me what happened when I kept pokin’ around their business. I was in a coma for six days. After … I was strugglin’ … you know, some of it never came back. It’s one of the reasons we got out of the city when Mikey finally got out. I don’t know if that’s gonna follow me…” He’d gestured at his head, the scars that still carved pale lines amongst the thick pelt of dark hair. The Agnellis weren’t the sort of guys you could walk away from, especially when you were the reason for half the losses they’d taken, their people wouldn’t stop. One day that’d mean Nemo crawling back here, Emiliano’s crazy bursting out of him like a super nova again, and maybe this time Roxxi would be the one in the path of it.
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ROXANNE BRASCHI
Chimera
psychic-skinwalker
Posts: 176
Age:
30
Occupation:
Professor at Whitmore College
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Chase Buckley
Played by:
Julia
Last seen May 17, 2024 19:45:21 GMT
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Post by ROXANNE BRASCHI on Jun 13, 2023 1:06:22 GMT
━ i don't know where i'm going, but i sure know where i've been ━ SHE REMEMBERED HOW SHE FELT WHEN SHE PULLED HIM ONTO THE stage, and it was nothing like what she thought now. Originally, Roxxi had pegged him as a sexy kind of ugly, a guy that would welcome her attention and probably buy her a beer before she jumped his bones. She’d gotten less than an hour with Chase before she found out who he was, and from that moment on it had been a slow build. At first, she would’ve described it as the start before everything went downhill, but… it wasn’t that anymore. Her uncle would murder Chase and use her to find him if he got the chance, but Roxxi would die before she let Emiliano take away the future father of her children. And that’s what they were. Nobody could change that━not Emiliano, Giorgia, or any of the other Agnellis, and especially not Mikey.
Roxxi shook her head when he trailed off with his maybes. It was nothing. Other than helping him with a few full moons━which neither would tell Chase about━her interactions with Mikey were almost nonexistent. And, Dio, Chase knew his brother, didn’t he? Did Mikey seem like the kind of man who possessed a talent for excellent pillow talk? Again, that wasn’t a joke she was about to make right now. Roxxi wasn’t terrific at keeping her mouth shut, but she’d (unfortunately) had to learn.
He wanted to tell her. Her chest seized at the idea, but she breathed long and steady, and knew she would eventually let it go. It didn’t make her feel sick the same way it had the day she visited him in the hospital. Roxxi knew she wasn’t guilty of doing something to him, but she was terrified of the feelings his honesty might provoke. And she hated the idea that people she knew could’ve ever laid a finger on him.
She smiled when he laughed, but not because she was amused with him, only because it was so good to hear it again. She wasn’t sure she ever would.
Chase found a chair to settle in while she went to the “package” she’d intended to deposit at his door. Roxxi opened the wine to let it breathe, then glanced at Chase and slid it across the table, out of his reach. He wasn’t allowed to drink from it yet. Roxxi picked up the bag full of containers next, and though she’d only packed enough for one person, her “one” was more like three. At least she would be able to properly heat the Osso Buco, though, and not just stick it into the microwave like some people.
The container of cacio e pepe (a callback to better days, even if her sink had been malfunctioning) went into the microwave, however, and Roxxi pulled out a pot and a frying pan to reheat the veal shanks and sauce. And, on second thought, she’d put the risotto in the microwave after the pasta. Roxxi opened the containers and dished the contents into their respective cookware as Chase started his story, listening quietly.
Her eyes burned with tears at the words ‘That’s when I decided to become a cop’ and the meaning it held for both of them. That was when he decided to take the path of a good man, to become a hero━her hero. Little Roxxi’s secret inspiration, and a pain in the ass for the people they despised most.
For a moment, she got stuck on one word: made. The guys that made him do all that. Mikey had made the decision on his own, he had decided to follow them… and she was ashamed of herself for even thinking it. She sounded like one of them. They were scum, and Georgie’s “faction” had gone around recruiting young, impressionable boys to do their dirty work and keep the city in its pit of despair, all the while letting Emiliano’s money-making machine continue churning.
Roxxi tried not to flinch when he said their name━the name that had been hers (on paper, at least). It was never one she claimed, but it still branded her mother and sisters━not that she claimed them, either. She turned and leaned back against the counter, watching Chase get through his story, tears gathering in her eyes.
“Oh, Chase,” She whispered, sniffling as she abandoned their food and went to him, taking his cheeks between her hands. She turned his head down and kissed the tiny scars she’d seen before, then the bridge of that scarred, perfect nose, and, finally, his lips. “I’m so sorry.” Roxxi bent to hug him around the neck, her arms resting on his shoulders. She wanted to comfort him, but she also had to hide her face and how she bit her lip to stave off the sobs. “I’m so sorry that happened; I’m sorry I wasn’t there, that I didn’t know you then.” She only knew of him, and she felt the same thing that night, even though she was a skinny teenager with the attitude of someone five times her size.
Roxxi pulled back to look at him, focusing on his dark eyes through the haziness of her tears. “You sound like such a hero, amore mio. Like one of those… action figures you like, except real.” She teased, pecking his upper lip just as the microwave beeped at her. Roxxi pulled away completely to return to the food, but not before planting another kiss on his forehead. “So, are you… pursuing it further? Or did their ‘warning’ do its job?” She wouldn’t blame him if it had, but that wasn’t her Chase. And it wouldn’t stop Emiliano, either.
Exchanging the cacio e pepe with the risotto, Roxxi flipped the shanks and stirred the pot’s contents. As soon as the risotto was heated, she divided it onto each plate, then set two veal shanks atop Chase’s, one on her own, and spooned the braising sauce on top. She kept the gremolada in its container and took it to the table, then the plates (with cutlery), and the cacio e pepe was set next to Chase’s plate━Roxxi wasn’t really in the mood for eating, just cooking. As she brought wine glasses back on her third trip, Roxxi pulled her seat next to Chase’s and poured, continuing, “When we first started seeing each other… that accident you had on the job. I visited you in the hospital?” She glanced at him, though she was sure he’d remember the time Nemo had almost murdered him in the street. “You said it was a job hazard and that you didn’t want to talk about it right then. But… you never did. Was that part of this? Did it already follow you?” Roxxi asked slowly, gently, hoping to cover her bases. She did want to know what it was like from his side, but she’d been there that time, working valiantly at his side as “Domino.” Mostly, she wanted to cover her bases, so that when another slip-up inevitably came, she could return to this conversation as proof that he already told her. And wasn’t that just fucking awful?
CHASE BUCKLEY |
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CHASE BUCKLEY
Demon
Posts: 139
Age:
38
Occupation:
Detective
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Roxanne Braschi
Played by:
ANGE
Last seen Apr 27, 2024 18:43:01 GMT
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Post by CHASE BUCKLEY on Jul 1, 2023 17:28:13 GMT
Both Roxxi and Mikey had tried to lay some part of themselves bare – alright, definitely still the wrong choice of words, Chase realised, mentally slapping himself – in this kitchen. He’d barely been able to step into it for days afterwards. Every time he did, it felt like they were there, just out of the corner of sight, waiting to ambush him with other things he desperately didn’t want to hear. Gradually he’d been able to look and there’d been that pang in his chest when there’d been little trace of either one of them there. What he’d wanted – to have both of them out of sight and mind – slowly became what he wanted the least. Now it felt fitting to try and do the same, although he suspected that Roxxi’s smile would fade as he started to offer up his own truth.
’Hey baby, I tried to be Batman and clean up my city, but yeah, I’m no superhero. I got my ass kicked so badly they thought I was gonna die, instead. Best part – it might happen again if those assholes come for my brother.’ Who wanted that in a relationship? Love might still have been clinging stubbornly to both of them, the future they’d wanted clutched in a white knuckle grip, but all of that had to have its limits somewhere.
Settling on one of the kitchen chairs, he felt practically ancient again, like every bone in his body ached deep in its core. Like they had when he’d come around from that coma. A body that’d been encased in smoke and cotton fool, feeling heavy as lead from the bruises and whatever they’d shot him up with to keep the pain of broken bones and a nearly broken soul at bay. Chase watched Roxxi start to unpack, starting to unpack his story at the same time. Dark eyes flicked down from her to the glass of wine that was slid out of his reach and back up again, an exhaled puff of air the only small sign of some brighter emotion.
It flickered deeper in his gut as she bustled around his kitchen. Domesticity, something that’d become so normal for them suddenly a band aid to hold together the parts of him that’d been shattered long before Roxxi had walked into that comic book shop. His throat burned as he said ‘Agnellis’, almost like he was Harry Potter not wanting to give the darkness in his life power by saying the name aloud. Who was he kidding though? Emiliano’s power had been over his family from the minute Georgie had convinced Mikey to go out that first time. Bringing Mikey to Mystic Falls had just been an illusion of actually taking it back. While they hid here, pretending that Emiliano didn’t exist, they weren’t ever gonna do that.
His gaze had continued to wander – the microwave, the pan set on the stove (there was probably some reason he’d never get as to why you had to heat the meat up that way), Roxxi’s hands, her hair, little bits of her that he’d allow himself to find comfort in. As he got to the end, admitting that he didn’t know if Emiliano was gonna slither out from under his rock and turn up here (or more likely send his people), it rose to Roxxi’s face and he saw the tears gather there.
”Hey,” he whispered as she took his face in her hands and dipped his head to kiss at the spots where he knew the scars showed pale against his skin. ”Baby, I’m the one who should be sorry. I didn’t tell you about this at the start … you didn’t sign on for this.” Chase wrapped his arms around her waist, dipping his head into the crook of her neck to breathe in her scent. She wanted to have been there for him through that? She was crazy. God he loved her for it. He huffed out something that might’ve been a laugh, feeling it wash between his cheek and her neck, warm and somehow comforting.
Chase wet his lips, squeezing her gently. ”I’m alright. Now. I’m alright and I promise, baby, it’s gonna be alright.” One way or another. He’d take the scars again, end up right back in another hospital bed if it meant that Roxxi and Mikey were gonna be safe from all of this. The laugh gurgled out of him, with a watery edge that had him sniffing it back. ”I was thinkin’ of tellin’ you that I was tryin’ to be Batman – you know, takin’ the scum out of my city – but I wasn’t sure you’d get it.” Skimming his hand up her back, Chase curled a hand around the back of Roxxi’s neck the moment before she drew back, leaving just the imprint of her kiss against his lip and forehead.
Sagging back as she moved away, Chase rubbed his hand over his chest and shook his head. If Nemo had stayed in town he wasn’t gonna have much of a choice about any choice about dialling back what he was doing. ”Not like I was,” he admitted. The lines had sprung back up between his brows, although not with the same intensity. ”If they’re not gonna stop, then I can’t. You know, Mikey’s lost enough for them, and I don’t want them hurtin’ you to try and get at either one of us either.” He’d been hands off since they’d got here – other than trying to track Nemo down after the attack. Maybe it was time he went on the offensive again, slowly trying to peck away
Tracing his tongue over his upper lip, like the lingering taste of Roxxi would steady him, Chase watched her move back to cooking. The scent of food was filling the kitchen, awakening an appetite that’d been patchy over the handful of weeks she’d been gone. That was cacio e pepe. Damn. His mouth started to water, his body slowly levering upright as Roxxi began to set the table. He drew his plate closer, reached for the wine that’d been set apart from him earlier. The fork froze in his hand as Roxxi settled in and turned down the heat under his appetite for a moment. ”It wasn’t an accident,” he admitted after the string of questions about that snake bastard Nemo.
He set his fork down on his plate, dragging a hand over his face again. ”I didn’t want it to chase you off, you know? Emiliano had this kid – adopted, not one of his own – and I guess his dad spent the last twenty years fillin’ his head with shit about us. He turned up and … things got crazy. I hadn’t seen him since Mikey was … since he got convicted … but he was back, accusin’ me of doin’ stuff. All the injuries, that was him. This dog chased him off in the end, the one that hangs around here sometimes – Domino. Maybe if she hadn’t been there, I wouldn’t be either. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you the truth then.” Chase’s frown deepened as he met her eye. ”You haven’t seen a guy around have you? Scars all over his face, like someone shoved him in a blender. I don’t think he’s still in town but…” He hadn’t exactly been fully aware of everything going on around him either – missing the cause of the tension between his girlfriend and his brother proved that.
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ROXANNE BRASCHI
Chimera
psychic-skinwalker
Posts: 176
Age:
30
Occupation:
Professor at Whitmore College
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Chase Buckley
Played by:
Julia
Last seen May 17, 2024 19:45:21 GMT
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Post by ROXANNE BRASCHI on Jul 23, 2023 16:08:50 GMT
━ i don't know where i'm going, but i sure know where i've been ━ DIO, HE DIDN’T KNOW THAT SHE HAD SIGNED ON FOR THIS. Roxxi knew what would become of them if she stayed, what she was risking, and she’d done it all because she loved him. She only hoped that, down the line━if he ever found out━he would find a way to accept it, too. She promised it was okay in little whispers, hugging him, holding Chase, and joking about his little comic heroes when she eventually got hold of herself enough to look him in the eyes again.
Roxxi laughed wetly and shook her head. She knew which one Batman was━she wasn’t blind━but she didn’t know his story or why he dressed up as an animal to save lives. “Not really… but they all do the same thing, anyway,” Roxxi teased, shrugging like it didn’t matter (an added burn), before she pecked his forehead and slipped away. Reheating the food was better. She’d felt like she had to hug him, and she was glad she did, but cooking was what made the anxiousness drip from her fingertips.
This was the next best thing.
He hadn’t given up. She knew he wouldn’t. His fight had waned━she hoped that wasn’t her fault━but the fire that drove him would never go out completely. Roxxi felt the same way; she had the same desire within her to defeat them. It was Chase’s battle, though, and he deserved to win it. She would just help as much as she could.
Her fingers stuttered over the food, one of the veal shanks dropping heavily into the pan. He didn’t want her to get hurt because they were coming after him. He didn’t know it was the other way around, that Emiliano would seek to destroy Chase and Mikey both for his own purposes and because it would teach Roxxi a lesson. She felt so fucking sick. She almost wished there was more to cook.
“Sì,” Roxxi mumbled, “You wouldn’t be… you if you gave up. And you shouldn’t. Not on anyone’s account.” Even if it would keep him only marginally safer, Roxxi couldn’t tell him to stop hunting them. It was his life’s work, and the Agnellis wouldn’t suddenly forgive him just because he made it too easy.
She set the table as he spoke, and finally settled in next to Chase, asking about Nemo as if she hadn’t been there. That would be harder to explain than her connection to them.
Roxxi forked noncommittally at her food, her eyes flicking up to Chase’s darker ones, only beginning to smile through her tears as he mentioned Domino. She’d done her best that day, trying desperately to save him, and managed to take a chunk out of Nemo when she did. “It’s okay,” She whispered, waving away his apology. Roxxi pretended to consider it, then shook her head and lied, “No.” Well, she hadn’t seen him since that day, so was it truly a lie? Only, she knew where to find him━or knew someone who would━and she hadn’t acted on it. She would if she ever saw him, though, and Roxxi had told Giorgia as much. She wouldn’t spare him just because of her sister’s feelings. She’d grind him into fucking dust for touching Chase.
“Emiliano is… who?” Roxxi asked, shoving a forkful of risotto in her mouth to hide the way she said his name. Maybe an accent over something so undeniably Italian wouldn’t have been weird, but she was overthinking it, worried that he’d notice and think it was suspicious. “The boy who died… his father?” It wasn’t outlandish to presume Emiliano’s name would’ve been printed somewhere. She remembered when he came home bristling, ripping off his tie and meeting with his lawyer, discussing how the jury could easily be swayed. He’d never let his name be known publicly as connected with his myriad of organizations throughout New Orleans, and she supposed that was why it was so hard to pin anything on him. She was almost surprised Chase knew his name, but she shouldn’t have been if she thought about how much work he must’ve put into researching this. “It’s bigger than just that group of guys Mikey was with that night, isn’t it?” She asked with a frown, staring down at her food again like her plate would swallow her whole for all the lies. She almost wished it would.
She took a big gulp of wine, her eyes flicking over his plate, then back up at Chase finally, “You said he accused you of doing ‘stuff.’ What stuff? Did you?” Chase seemed just as surprised as she was to see Nemo looking like a chew toy. Plus, no matter who he was, she couldn’t imagine Chase would have it in him to do such a thing.
“Mangia, mangia,” Roxxi puffed suddenly, swirling her hand in a circle at Chase when he wasn’t eating fast enough for her liking. He’d have to finish hers, too, at this rate. She felt sick for every moment she had to pretend that she didn’t know the men Chase was talking about, that she didn’t share blood with them.
CHASE BUCKLEY |
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CHASE BUCKLEY
Demon
Posts: 139
Age:
38
Occupation:
Detective
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Roxanne Braschi
Played by:
ANGE
Last seen Apr 27, 2024 18:43:01 GMT
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Post by CHASE BUCKLEY on Aug 16, 2023 19:06:03 GMT
He coulda bored her to those tears telling her the minute subtleties between one scarred, unrelentless antihero and another, but this wasn’t the time. Chase’s laugh steadied, his hands slid up her back. ”One day I’ll tell you,” he promised – because they did have more days together now. They hadn’t cemented all those cracks that had raced between them when the words had left her mouth almost right in this spot, they were patching them though and that gave him hope. They’d laze on the couch again, Roxxi leaning against his chest, rolling the eyes that still glittered now, pretending she didn’t get one word that was coming out of his mouth about it all. He would read her the best parts of whatever graphic novel he had on the coffee table, ignoring the groans as he did his best impression of the Joker or Bane.
God, he would take all of that to have her here again – no lies between them anymore to damage the future they were trying to build together. Chase settled back as Roxxi moved away to the food, feeling the impression of her lips against his brow like they’d sizzled their way through his skin and carved themselves right into his brain. It gave him the strength he needed to get through the rest of his story, the parts that might have her realising that it wasn’t the future she was willing to build. Dark eyes darted down to the pot as the meat thudded into it, concern deepening the lines between his brows. Was that a sign that it was too much? Chase dragged his lower lip between his teeth, shaking his head at her. ”You’re right, I might be someone smarter,” he said hoarsely. Him being him had gotten them into it all in the first place. If he hadn’t stuck his nose into the gang’s business, if he hadn’t followed Mikey, if he hadn’t fought the Agnellis at every step – maybe Mikey wouldn’t have ended up where he did. The fact that it could’ve been worse had been pushed aside a thousand times over when the guilt bit. Nah, he knew better than to believe that was the truth, but the what ifs had always lingered.
Relief shivered through his gut as he felt Roxxi’s reassurance on what he had continued to do – despite all those doubts. Not fighting might’ve meant that eventually it was a gun in Mikey’s hand and his conscience failing to give a shit when he fired it and some innocent store owner was bleeding out on the floor. Just the thought of where Mikey might’ve ended up had his stomach swimming. ”What if I’m makin’ it worse for everyone around me by not stoppin’?” he asked, his voice right. On Mikey’s account, on Roxxi’s, even on his parents’ he might have eventually caved and just hoped that Emiliano would stay on his side of the state lines. Nemo was here though, he couldn’t even start to think about it. Nemo had been a flicker in the corner of his vision ever since that day in the street. The shadow that made his heart leap. The nightmare that woke him in a cold sweat, an imaginary bullet burning behind his eyes. Lying to both her and Mikey had been about protecting them. Mikey would’ve gone after that son of a bitch and Roxxi – God, maybe they’d see her as the one weak spot that they could manipulate. That son of a bitch trying to hurt Domino had given him the strength to try and peel himself off the floor and stop him.
Relief unstuck his tongue from the roof of his mouth, pouring through him as Roxxi swore that she hadn’t seen him around town. Puffing out a breath, Chase nodded. ”If you do see him, you tell me OK? Don’t hesitate, just walk away from him, get somewhere safe and let me know. I’ll be there in minutes with every damn cop in town right behind me.” Fear would choke him then but it’d lend him wings to get there. He hadn’t asked Mikey the same way yet, but he knew that was coming. Nemo knew Mikey was here, he’d recognise him and he’d do whatever the fuck Emiliano asked of him.
Chase picked up his fork, hesitated on using it again. His eyes held Roxxi’s steady, his mouth thinning at the thought of telling her enough about Emiliano that she could maybe get herself further in trouble trying to watch out for him. ”Yeah,” he finally rasped. ”The son of a bitch who probably put all his kids up to that shit. He’s like a cheap ring – all shiny on the surface, but tarnished underneath. Likes to pretend he’s above the scum in the city. He’s not. Nobody attached to that family does anythin’ without his permission.” And there was enough of them in the family too. Georgie had brothers, at least a handful of sisters too. He coulda just replaced Georgie with another, let them run wild again. There’d been no proof that he could nail down on any of it. Emiliano was too slick for any of that. He probably had dirt on every lawyer in the city, guaranteeing that nobody would ever find the balls to prosecute him. ”No!” Chase’s fork clattered down again. He reached out, curling fingers around Roxxi’s wrist for a moment. ”I’ve … the job’s never been easy, but I hadn’t seen Nemo since we were kids. Even if I had … I wouldn’t have done that. Someone carved him up, like they were chopping up a piece of meat – in the worst way possible. I’m not like them, baby. No matter how hard I wanted to see them suffer, I wouldn’t stoop the way they did.” Justice was a cell, not bleeding every single one of them dry. The smell of blood alone turned his stomach these days, the flashing memories of what had happened just months ago with the task force could drop him to his knees. Eat. Chase swallowed like he could force away the lump in his throat and bring his appetite back. He wasn’t gonna be ravenous – despite the fact that he had a feast right there – with the image of Nemo’s twisted, scarred face still in his mind. For Roxxi he picked up his fork though, carding at the veal until a tender chunk broke off. ”Am I still gonna get all of this every day?” he asked hoarsely. ”Meals for two? It wasn’t the same when it was just me eating it. I wanted you there. I want you there … here. I want us again.” Free of the weight that had almost been drowning him before that last revelation had gone and pulled him under. He needed her, probably a thousand times more than Roxxi needed him, needed the woman he loved.
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ROXANNE BRASCHI
Chimera
psychic-skinwalker
Posts: 176
Age:
30
Occupation:
Professor at Whitmore College
Status:
In a Relationship
Partner:
Chase Buckley
Played by:
Julia
Last seen May 17, 2024 19:45:21 GMT
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Post by ROXANNE BRASCHI on Sept 6, 2023 16:31:37 GMT
━ i don't know where i'm going, but i sure know where i've been ━ THERE HAD BEEN MORE THAN A DOZEN TIMES WHEN ROXXI nearly told Chase everything. She wanted to so badly, so that she wouldn’t have to sneak around anymore, that he could be angry and then forgive her, but she knew she couldn’t. This could be the one thing he couldn’t look past, and it would only put him in more danger if he knew. She didn’t want that. She couldn’t let him be distracted from his goal, either━and that’s what the truth would do.
“You aren’t.” She shook her head twice sharply, looking over her shoulder at him. “They don’t seem like the type of people to stop just because you do, and you can’t give up. This is the reason you became a police officer, yes? To help people━to do good. Allowing them to get away with it wouldn’t be…” Roxxi looked back at the food, tearing up as she shook her head again, this time very weakly. She didn’t want to cry. He wouldn’t understand all the emotions behind it, and she couldn’t explain. She didn’t want to encourage him to put himself in more danger, but she also couldn’t encourage him to stop seeking justice for Mikey━and himself. It was all Roxxi wanted, too.
She sat with him finally, lying about Nemo and hating herself for it. But what was she going to say, Yes, I attacked him as that dog, and my sister is sleeping with him? Of course not. She’d crack Nemo’s skull if she saw him again, and that was all Roxxi needed to know for herself.
Roxxi nodded in understanding, then continued forking lazily at her food until she held Chase’s gaze again. She asked who Emiliano was, the idea of covering her tracks causing a sickness to bubble in her stomach.
He was right. Well, almost━Roxxi had never cared or asked for Emiliano’s permission for anything in her life, but, otherwise, yes━Emiliano was scum, just like anyone else who shared the same fake last name as that motherfucker. She only nodded again, feeling fucking useless as she did, but what else was there to say? She wasn’t supposed to know any of this━Roxxi couldn’t agree to it, either, otherwise it would look suspicious, and she couldn’t just wave it off with another excuse about “seeing an article.”
Roxxi jumped slightly as Chase’s fork was dropped to the table, and she looked up at him with wide eyes, surprised even if she didn’t know why he was vehemently defending himself. For all he knew, Roxxi didn’t know what “stuff” (as he’d described it) he was talking about. She could, however, put it together. “I know, cucciolo.” She sighed, turning her hand over to take his and squeeze it softly. “I know you aren’t like them.” And that was why she’d loved him her whole damn life. “So… he thought you did that to him? Why?” She asked, furrowing her brows and frowning. Chase seemed just as confused as she was that day, but perhaps he might’ve had an inkling after he had longer to think about it.
She told him to eat instead of dwelling on it, but the comparison of Nemo’s face to chopped meat… well, she hoped he had an appetite. Roxxi managed some of her own risotto and a small piece of lamb. Objectively, it tasted great (not as good re-heated), but it wasn’t exactly sending any signals to her stomach that she was suddenly starving.
Her eyes shifted down to her plate until Chase spoke again, then they were jumping to his, tears welling in them. Yes, she liked this topic better. Them; their love━and how it wouldn’t end. “Of course, amore mio,” She whispered, smiling as she reached out to squeeze one of his hands. “You will always have me.” And that was the truth, whether he wanted her or not━as proven by this. Roxxi shifted and stood, moving to his lap instead, sitting on one of Chase’s broad thighs, an arm curling around his shoulders. “... I may not cook every day, though,” She teased, leaning in to press her lips to his, then his cheek, and his jaw, before she hugged him again. “I love you.” Roxxi said gently, though the feeling was anything but. She loved Chase with all that she was, so much so that it hurt every day, but in the best kind of way━like she would give him anything. And, ultimately, Roxxi knew she would. He didn’t even have to ask.
CHASE BUCKLEY | zee end
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